if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
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