Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
