its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I am full of burrito and curiosity
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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