But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
