I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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