The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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