I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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