It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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