you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
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I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
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We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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