honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
