I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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