How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
