it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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