You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
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Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
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Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
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