just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Randomize
