all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
