I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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