Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
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