I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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