Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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