She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
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i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
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So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.