when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.