So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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