We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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