I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
This is classic penis vs brain.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
