We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
