Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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