I skipped work to stalk him.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Randomize