Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
