I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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