I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I just want to make out with him forever
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize