"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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