ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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