I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
