her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
