One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
sex in a hospital.. check
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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