Jerry, you need to find god
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
