Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
