I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You ate ashes out of my bong
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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