I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
