He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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