So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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