she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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