Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
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