my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
