ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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