ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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