I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
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