Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize