OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
someone owes me an orgasm
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
