The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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