No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize