woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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